my husband left me because he was unhappy

Good luckto us bothwe will be OK though. They leave behind their friends, the jobs that they love, and the happy memories from years gone by. What hes actually regretful about is how he left, which means he probably regretted telling you. I love him but Im so angry at him for leaving us. I feel dead inside. Sort the legal separation stuff and you can do a divorce online for free. I said that i am going to the car and he followed me and said if you leave i am calling an attorney on Monday and i am so sick and tired of you. Well one thing youve not mentioned is being with an alcoholic. All he has said, via text, is that im an awful person who talks down to him which is not true. We believe that is best left to our members. He is worried about more his material things than me or our marriage. I have no answers.she wont tell me why she left.the only thing she will say is file for divorce. And if you cant forgive him, it might be time for you to walk away from this relationship completely because this isnt a good place for anyone to be in. Sounds familiar except mine was emotional abuse, yip, happened to me too, thank g i kept postponing the wedding date or id be stuck in an abusive marriage with a traumatized kid. Write to Family Life, The Guardian . Their best advice was for me to just get pregnant., My husband left me after going into a depression. We spoke a lot he told me he had met someone else but it meant nothing to him apparently. She never wanted to make it more difficult then it already was for her children. I think she kept downing our relationship. I was very scared and nervous . She says she is doing this for our marriage. Married 3 with a baby, also 3. This I also discovered. Husband walked out a week before thanksgiving on our three kids and me. Barking dogs are stressing him out and him yelling at the neighbours stresses me out. He basically told me he was just doung the right thing when I asked why he married me (I got pregnant before we were married) and judging by his behavior I see that he was definately acting like he was unhappy and just married me to do the right thing. No way! You can get a new cat or dog, or you can even get a new boyfriend or girlfriend. I has been left with no rhyme or reason you can read my earlier blog. After finally loosing respect for him I no longer feel the pain. And although I have never been violent, I would become upset or angry over silly things and thus this is where the problem would arrive Well five years ago when our son was a freshman in highschool I received a phone call from him he sounded like he was in a state of shock. Its been over a year. There is real evil in the world you are absolutely correct. Cant eat or sleep, I feel depressed. I was a stay Hm dad for 3 years and I think it caused the divorce. Youre an excellent father and she should be happy to have you. Psych Central does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. But they are forced to be with her every other weekend. Help is available, and we wish you the best of luck in your search. Good luck to you all..Ive learnt in the last month..love yourself, think positive and ask for help when you need. I know how you feel Matt, im so sorry for you. Its the idealistic lovethe one that seems like the fairy tales we read as children. Hey there all. He just kept saying it was his problem. He decided this life, our life, wasnt for him.. Just worry about yourself. My mom is sick. I was up all night waiting for her and when she got home at 8 am, it really hit the fan. She went to her mothers. Leaving Marriage Because God Wants Me to Be Happy He was my best friend, and had promised we could co-parent., My childs father was leaving me. As soon as she had her degree and job, she didnt need me anymore at least thats how Ive chosen to see it. Young women make sure you know all about a man before you commit because those few less desirable traits you have some doubts about may end up becoming major aspects of his character. However, there are some people who always need that new high of love, and those are often the people who fall out of love and move on to something new. Btw she is the only family i have here and i cant get past the fact that she doesnt love me anymore I have paid for the clothes on his back to the cigs in his mouth since day 1. Hello all im still Jon.and yes Im still sad and miserable and confused and lonely.. You deserve better and just live better than he does. I will pray you find the strength to accept this and that you two can still have a good relationship even though it will not be romantic any longer. I hate waking up at 4 am and not feel him laying in the bed beside me. It is the hardest thing I ever been through. It's called anhedonia, the inability to feel pleasure or interest in anything. Any advice? He said that over the years we relied too much on each other and have nothing to show for it. anyway thanks for listening, Thank you for your comment, Lorrie. I froze that moment then 6 years later I was traumatized again. We drifted apart, the excitement, the compassion and love faded away to nothing. Please send me strength. He just kept saying it was 'his problem.' I later learned this depression likely stemmed from him not wanting to leave his son, but feeling like he was stuck in a marriage he didn't want to be in. Just focus on those kids and how you can better yourself for them and you. Put me down controlled me ..I Was a walking living breathing definition of a battered husband. As with a garden, when a relationship isnt tended to, it withers and dies. Women are very good these days breaking many mens hearts, and i know other friends that had it happened to them as well. Rather, letting go is about loosening unhealthy attachments. They immediately started living together before I was ever handed a divorce. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. And if she cant see that its her loss. Also, start shopping for insurance now. I am dealing with being invited to his brothers for thanksgiving. We have always gotten along great,In every way,always had fun together.The good times outnumber the bad. I guess I still love her as pathetic as that sounds. Theyre also communities where you can help other members solve their problems. Dear Kelly, If you think consulting with a mental health professional might help you, please use our directory to find a good fit. I know for my own good I will have to pick up my shattered heart and live as if it never happened. Apparently, like the physical pain, and the way I processed that, the emotional pain and mental obsession I suffered, was on automatic; it was a LEARNED response that had obviously been running, on perpetual pain, not unlike continuous *seizure* activity. I have kept in touch with her help her financially and tried my hardest to help the situation between the kids and her all to no avail . After he left her for a younger woman, Mark Harrison was portrayed in his wife's newspaper column and recent novel as a selfish cad. I forgave him as this exact thing had happened in my first marriage (all that he knew already ) he had convinced me that my ex was a looser and that I should never doubt or mistrust HIM when all the time he was covering up that he had no feelings or empathy for anyone else but himself. Its worth absolutely zero to her. I remained strong on the outside and everyone asked how I kept it together, but that doesnt mean it wasnt extremely difficult and the most traumatic experience in my life. A therapist or counselor can often be supportive and helpful. If we move, he doesnt want to stay in the state but, the kind of small town where he would be happy generally has no work which in my view is not a win/win. Is he struggling with finances? Perhaps your husband has a personality disorder. Im not so much after advice, but comfort would be great right about now. My grandmother raised 3 girls on her own as a widower at just 42. We have a beautiful son together. How can somewhon do that to a spouse that has done nothing other than give them all the love and compassion,loyalty,feelings,and commitment for life. I found that he had taken my key out of my purse for the car. I dont want to hear oh hes a jerk for leaving or he probably found someone else. Im sad, I want him back more than anything else in my life, so right now I cant think past hoping my phone rings, that he emails me, comes back to me..cause truth is, he probably isnt and I dont want to deal and dont know how to deal with that. I cannot take you anymore. Practice Management Software for Therapists, Rules and Ethics of Online Therapy for Therapists, How to Send Appointment Reminders that Work, http://www.goodtherapy.org/advanced-search.html, http://www.goodtherapy.org/in-crisis.html, https://www.goodtherapy.org/advanced-search.html, https://www.goodtherapy.org/in-crisis.html. I am not trying to portray myself as a prince but I have given this woman my everything,My heart my soul my compassion, my trust my loyalty,My everything.And she just shattered everything to pieces.She takes a lot of meds for her mental and Physical problems,and she is going through Menopause. What happened? Abuse should definitely be on the list. Although I was half expecting it in the weeks leading up to the night we separated, the impact was greater than anything I have experienced. I just cant believe how active this board appears with people who are going through this. I have the greatest respect for those who endure the bad times and work to resolve and remedy their challenges. If you didnt it wouldnt be human. with my kids asking the same question and my narcissistic ex looks like a victim of a situation that just didnt work out as we grew apart as he puts it. My partner of 27 years has said hes had enough. Friday comes and of course, she unplugs the house phone and turns off her cell and refuses to let me see my kids. Yes I will stick with you and let the girls know they are unfair and mean in the way they treat me. Im so confused I thought thats why I was there everyday. So I tried suicide at 23 and from that failure I ended up getting professional help for the first time to gain understanding of why I was the way I was. We wanted to provide links to some resources that may be relevant to you here. One way you may seek fresh validation and appreciation might be through a new romantic partner. And how the friends of a man or woman who then leaves there partner for another is accepted. "It is the same thing, over and over with you.". She promised she was done . Must be so difficult to know that you gave up all this time and energy and money to only be crapped on by someones narcissism. Just type online discussion forums into any search engine and youll find plenty of forums that can help you get through this. Can anyone offer any words of hope? one big reason for her change,A year ago she quit taking antidepressant meds cold turkey and went through menopause at the same time, and it made her change not just mentally, but physically she totally changed her appearance. At the time, my husband was working 14-18 hours a day just to keep food on the table. He also uses the excuse that my 2 sons, not his btw, are too much for him to handle. She is such a loving person always called him to say hi. When A Depressed Partner Falls Out Of Love - Mental Help It feels better to chat about it, too know others are going through the same thing & it does suck. That really hurts. They dont even have to contain a mother or father, they could be aunts, uncles, your step-family or even friends. So that l will never ever go back to him . She had an affair and i found out about, and I think she cant stand living with the guilt, so by leaving the marriage the guilt goes away. Just wondering how you are getting ready to visit your parents And getting ready for Thanksgiving. There is a large age gap, which wasnt a problem at first, but now he works all the time and only cares about money. You can also visit her website Mint Movement here. My friends have brilliant in all this and Im starting to feel like in time I will get over this but the hurt is sometimes unbearable. But the reality is, I dont want to move to the next phase of what do I do if he doesnt. I read somewhere that narcsassists will never loose any sleep over our pain . Heal your ego and your heart first, and then see where you stand with your emotions. The night we separated he told me he loved me but, Not in that way anymore. Someone else would have appreciated it and been there with me. Hi.im married to my husband forfor 4 years.i made more money than him.I stuck by him through his madness.Drinking and drugging.He never went for help.I always felt he was doing what he wanted because he just wanted to.I cared for him too much.I let my guard down.He now has a better job and only four months being employed,he says we have nothing in common, we should be friends.He not used to anything.Now he gets another chance of living a better life, hes gone.All he did was lie to me . A month ago my partner of 4 years woke up got ready for work, was just about to leave when I asked him about meeting to go book our summer holidays he turned to me and said I dont think we should as I dont live you anymore Im leaving you. But, believe it or not, research suggests there's a dark side to dieting. We met at school and Im not ready for what happened, she just left for our friend. The GoodTherapy.org Team is not qualified to offer professional advice, but we encourage you to reach out. Sociopaths goal is take a human being and destroy them down to the bottom of their soul. stop letting him treat you like a paper plate and let someone treat you like fine china. Let them go find their happiness now, it sounds like its time or rather soon. Hes 45 yo, 21 years married. Unfortunately he watched a lot of YouTube videos by life coaches etc who say terrible things about the mentally ill, mostly get out while you can advice. Im at stay at home mom and he took all our money maxed out my personal credit card and I dont know what to do. If Your Spouse Says These 9 Things, Your Marriage May Be In Trouble Admittedly, infidelity has been a factor over th years with at least 3 incidents in th past with 1 most recent being 6 months into our marriage. His excuse is he doesnt want the government involved. I begged, texted, emailed.all in the hopes hed realize the mistake me made and come back. Note to self, pay more attention, and get reliable input from friends and family. She left you without warning after 10 years of marriage because her family and a so called friend pushed her to do so. Obviously, you wanted to marry him/her and you knew that marriage was tough. But, at the same time I have been for so many years, and still am, the focus of so much of her hate, scorn, and malice I really dont want live with that type of negativity one more day than I have to I am not a therapist. It sounds life a lot of work, but its not. I will not lie to you, this will not be easy, but I can promise YOU WILL feel relief from staying true to yourself. It hurts to have been so stupid to believe she ever wanted it back at all, probably just guilt for what she did. Married to a Workaholic: When Your Spouse Works All the Time I just cant wrap my brain around it. Jesus did not ever condone abusive behavior but he also didnt give you a right to judge your partner in a mental or physical illiness. The last was in 06 at a family reunion with her 1st cousin and the kids were with her. In terms of what I did, I was blind and did not see the signs. The ability to do what they want and when they want. Many things can slowly infect a marriagedistance, lack of communication, and sexual issues. Thanks, If she ever contacts you again say this, never talk to me again. He is on disability because of multiple chemical sensitivity. My ex left me the day after Christmas. Carrie and Al are actively seeking help and support. I asked him for an explanation. Only now its for real. The terms broken home, broken family, failed marriage, broken marriage, are still terms used to describe my situation, all of which I loathe. Hi my husband has a habit, of being with me for about 4-5months , then takes off to do any and every thing for about two weeks . The more you attempt to this the farther you push your spouse toward what the evil wanted to begin with, loneliness, despair, and hurt. My husband of 25 years is leaving me. Her behaviour to me changed and she became distant, rude and put me on the back burner. This Is What No One Tells You About Leaving Your Marriage - HuffPost I have a huge financial mess where I make more money than most people but I pay out so much. I dont know what to do anymore. Her husband left her too because he has another woman. I just wish I could hit fast forward. I wish I could meet one of these women in here going through all this pain and sweep them off their feet. I miss her deeply. I tried so hard to choke it all back as I rushed out of there. I have been through this, and I know that sometimes it may seem like your marriage is over, but it might not be. They sent phony legal documents to my mom, son and even my lawyer?? I saw people that appear to be in other countries on here. Any time i try to talk to her to tell her the pain I am going thru being apart from my kids and missing her but she gets upset then she blocks my phone and texts. This wasnt the fist time I had wanted to leave, but thankfully this time I felt more convinced that this relationship was not going anywhere. I am never able to maintain my anger for any length of time but never the less I am a poor former of words while angry so it is easy for me to see how I may have said something I didnt truly mean

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